July is the slowest month in the world.

1. Bees and I accidentally went to see a Motorhead tribute band. There was a guitarist with an amazing haircut, his earring and nose ring were connected by a chain. We both fell in love until it turned out he wasn't gay. It's difficult to explain. Afterward we met a pocket-sized Leo Sayer who tried to buy us drinks, but we had no place to put them. He was odd in a very soothing way. Other situations we accidentally stepped into that day included eating popcorn in the rain, a low-level bocce ball tournament, an early eighties rock sing-a-long, and watching fireworks in the middle of the street.

2. I found out that my pop singer dream crush has moved to New York, and why haven't I seen him yet? Possibly because I never go anywhere. He seems like the type to not go anywhere either. He probably lives in Brooklyn anyway, with a secret wife and a secret pair of babies, having secret brunches, sitting at an outdoor table while the babies sit in a high chair for two, the secret family dog's leash tied to the table leg.

3. One morning on the train there was a woman shouting about Jesus' love, so angrily and for so long. I could feel her breath on my arm. It was sad. The rest of that week was a terrible week. I was achy and I bruised my knuckles. I slept in my clothes two nights in a row and had early morning nightmares wherein I was lost on staircases and escalators, letting people down. When I was awake I kept losing track of time and my lungs hurt. I know that it was a coincidence, or July catching up with me, but it's more romantic to imagine that the woman's angry breath put a curse on me, ruining my sleep, filling my lungs with ghosts.

4. Walking home I approached a small shed behind a store. The store keeps their dumpster in it. The door was ajar, and as I got closer someone came out, but instead of a store employee, out walked (hopped) a squirrel holding an apple in his hands (paws). It was bigger than his head. When you see an animal holding a whole piece of fruit in his hands (paws), it's hard to resist the idea that if you spoke, he would understand what you said. He stood there for a bit, looking from side to side, nibbling, looking from side to side, nibbling. I love the way they stand, always crouching as though they believe that as long as they crouch no one can see them. Then I suppose he realized he wasn't invisible after all, because he ran (hopped) away with his apple. It looked crazy, and it was great.

5a. My subway station flooded. Not completely, but enough that I would have gone back home to hide under my bed, if I had an under my bed for hiding. I don't, so I looked for the shallowest path I could find to tiptoe along. The train lurched and leaned enough that I began hoping for a mid-tunnel evacuation, but I didn't get one. Later that day the trains stopped running altogether for a few hours. Rain is more exciting than people give it credit for. The whole world seems to be raining lately, there is more water in the sky than it knows what to do with.

5b. The street blew up a few blocks away from here just after I left for the day. I missed it by minutes, and because I sometimes live in my own small world, it took me a full day to figure out why so many people wanted to know whether I'd gotten home alright. I don't know, my mind was still on the flooded subway station. I mean, water was pouring down the stairs!

6. I'm a little bit worried that I will wake up one morning in a year or so and find that I'm married to Sam. Worried is a terrible word to use, but it's how I feel. I started taking this herbal supplement that's supposed to give me energy and improve my mood/stress level, but so far I'm half asleep/daydreamy all of the time and I've got awful butterflies. Nearly every feeling turns into a worry. Anyway, I probably won't marry Sam, but if I do I'm sure he'll make a good husband. He's tall and has lovely manners when it counts.

7. This list combined with NPR is making me glum. Look, things are great, sort of. Sublist! a. I trimmed my hair after weeks of scraggly resistance, and it's all bright and shiny now. I mean, it's silly, but that cheers me up. b. It's been raining all day in just the right amounts, and so long as the trains run long enough for me to get home tonight, I love it. (I accidentally typed tomnight at first, and that's a word the world has lived too long without, I think.) c. I found a good winter coat, I found a pair of boots, and I can't wait to wear them. d. I've found a favorite new hobby, looking at leaves. Listen, I can't explain it, but it's great. e. Jackpot is coming to visit on Saturday, and he'll be here for a full week and a half of meanders and bus adventures. f. I don't know, other things. I've been making this list for too long, and it's gotten away from me.