At the beginning of the week I was feeling sorry for myself and thinking, "Could everyone just go ahead and decide to go a little bit easy on me for a while?" Now, I don't know. Everyone is going a little bit easy on me. Sam called with plans and a regular Tuesday idea, like the one we had years ago when he and I and Francis and the Young Mr. O'Connell would meet every week to be noisy. After that George invited the Captain and I over for dinner, and I was made to watch Alias, and it was terrible, and I had such a good night. Tomorrow night everyone's coming to Queens for drinks at Michael's, and the Captain warned, "He said his plan is to get you alone at some point," which is perfect because we have geeky projects to work on, and we've given up waiting until the last moment to do these things. Every idea that everyone has seems designed to make me a little bit happier, and it's working. And then about mid-week next week my heart's going to stop a little, but I'm hoping for perfect weather and already planning what to wear and how to wear it.

In other news, the man at the liquor store wants to marry me. He kept me there forever with his questions, and he was nice, so I had to be polite. He wanted to know where I was from, because I have a face that's hard to tell, and when I said I was from here, it wasn't helpful at all. I left with a giant bottle of vodka, and he said, "See you soon." Which is pretty presumptuous considering he'd never seen me before, and considering the quantity of vodka I'd bought, but maybe I should go in tomorrow for another giant bottle, and see if he still wants to marry me then. What could be more romantic?

I guess I was having a tantrum at the time, but the idea of selling everything I own and running away to live by the water might not be a bad one. There is water all over the place, which gives me plenty of options. If they ever set up the ferry to Manhattan it would be nice to live in Rockaway, but if the ferry were there Rockaway would change, and not in a good way. Anyway I should probably do a better job of running away than that.

Now I am sleepy before dark, but I'm going to stay awake for a while longer, going for a walk, watching television, and reading a newspaper nearly a week too late.