I stayed in last night and felt drunk without drinking. I accidentally watched a movie secretly loaded with The Magnetic Fields, and I just couldn't take it. Over the past week or so I've gotten too emotional, and now I'm just cold. There's just no grass around here. I know that's a lie, but something in my head or my heart or somewhere keeps telling me, "There's just no grass around here."

Yesterday, or the day before, I decided not to worry about other people's feelings at the expense of my own, but I've decided that a hundred times before. We'll see. I hear crickets at night and if I'm near enough to sleep I wonder if I'm dreaming them. I try not to wonder too hard, because I think that if it is a dream I might wonder it away. It's really easy to wonder things away. It's really easy to change who a person is to you just by changing his name in your head.

Tonight I think I need to get out of here. I'll likely just end up at the radio show, but maybe something else will present itself. It just gets so late so fast, I just get too slow too soon.