He has the same initials. He might have the same name for all I know. I mean, he does, but he doesn't. I had nice dreams, my mother is a peach, the air smells more like grass every day, and the weather is perfect. In about two hours I'm probably going to have to throw my hands into the air and begin packing up, but I feel alright. I've spent the past couple of months learning how to sleep and learning how not to say the wrong things to the wrong people (for the most part), and it really makes a difference. Everything will be okay.

I still don't know what's going to happen. They say, "We'll try to let you know today, but we might not find out until Monday." The problem with that is that Monday is May, and I would have to be all out that day. It turns out that I can have my old room back, back up the stairs, but now I have three times as much to pile into it. It should only be temporary, but temporary could be two or three months. It's a bad time for money, every bit of it has somewhere to go.

I still haven't gone to Japan. Jackpot had to move and the timing got screwy, and then I committed myself to taking two young boys with me, so things have to be arranged around school vacations and visitation schedules and the absence of passports. That surprised me, I come from a family where babies get passports before they can walk. Anyway, I have to go to Japan, that is an expense I won't be able to avoid. Jackpot misses me and the boys are more excited than they've ever been. I've hardly been to any continents, and a new one will be good. I'll be able to say, "Please," and, "wait," and, "it's nice to meet you." I'll be able to say, "His words are kind, but his heart is cold," but after all of this time I think I've got the order of the words mixed up. Maybe it will turn into something that doesn't sound so mean.

Anyway, I'm oddly content and they're mowing grass outside. I like the sound of the mowers. I'll go for a walk and on the way back around stop by the hardware store to see about boxes. If it turns out that I don't need them, I'll just make a great big box castle and leave it outside in the middle of the night. The kids down the street will think it's some kind of magic and it will all be fine.