Today I am cross. I never use that word, but today is its moment. Luckily it's so bright out that people mistake my scowl for a squint. Soon it will be darker and the hot will become cooler. We are on the verge of a thunderstorm, and just now it is the one thing keeping me together. The phone keeps playing tricks on me, and it's approaching too late. The phone is a whole lot of trouble.

Speaking of the phone, Jackpot called the other early morning, the sound of the phone first waking and then confusing me. How long will it take for that ring to be familiar? It's a pretty basic ring, but somehow it sounds to me like someone screaming, and every call is an emergency. When he called the caller ID said, "0000123456," which was really too much. It's like code for, "Someone is calling you from very far away," code for, "At this distance numbers can't help you."

I just feel a mess today, desperate and hot and expectant and forgotten. Well, not hot anymore, as I've just had a shower, but the rest is true. You can't make a Monday too important, it's too much pressure for the start of the week. The expectant is almost behind me too, so. In an hour or three the rest may go as well, but disappointment will show up to fill the space they left behind. Cross isn't going anywhere.